Month: June 2017

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In a space and time continuem. When all we rely on and live for is hope and dreams and the possibilities of what they will bring.  Then the possibility becomes a reality and a miracle happens.  Mankind is too self absorbed to even recognize a miracle and takes chaos, absurdity and accidents to see it.

We are human and we make mistakes and we know that, but do we actually see the miracle when it comes our way or do we thrive and live so in the chaos that we miss it.  There are miracles everywhere that we look and the trick is to actually see it and recognize it without having to endure the madness and chaos… But then again do we need that chaos to bring a miracle and that being the only way to see it as a miracle? It wouldn’t be a miracle if there wasn’t chaos or accidents in my opinion then it would just be a normal happy day with good things happening and definitely not a miracle.

“Thermodynamic miracles… events with odds against so astronomical they’re effectively impossible, like oxygen spontaneously becoming gold. I long to observe such a thing.
And yet, in each human coupling, a thousand million sperm vie for a single egg. Multiply those odds by countless generations, against the odds of your ancestors being alive; meeting; siring this precise son; that exact daughter… Until your mother loves a man she has every reason to hate, and of that union, of the thousand million children competing for fertilization, it was you, only you, that emerged. To distill so specific a form from that chaos of improbability, like turning air to gold… that is the crowning unlikelihood. The thermodynamic miracle.”
– Dr. Manhattan

Miracles are not dependent on belief, but on reality. It is dependent on the observer and vantage point. Being naked in Antartica is a death sentence, but being naked with a lover a miracle.
The question you should always ask yourself is: “How many things had to go wrong for this miracle to happen? How many things had to happen for two people to meet?”

I’m just saying…

Xxx

Remember the days at school?  Growing up, feeling vulnerable and naive to the world, the feelings and the expectations of what your life has in store for you?

Remember that first crush you had with that boy or girl, too popular for you, and you never moved in the same circles and you were too deathly shy to even let on that you liked them.

Then the awkward stage starts where you can’t even look at them without blushing or hiding away. Your silliness making you look even sillier in their eyes because firstly they don’t even know you exist and secondly you just look stupid looking stupid which alienates you even further from them…

Those cruel awkward moment that we all lived through and not just for a day or a week but a whole school year or two.

I remember my first crush, primary school and he hung around with the brother of my best friend who we all hung around together and it was torture. This boy couldn’t even look at me or ask me a question or even just say hello and my cheeks would inflame, my legs become weak and I just burst out laughing, I looked ridiculously retarded and in no way was he ever going to like me.  I threw myself into my books and whenever we “hung” out, I just remained quiet and shy and that is how everyone knew me.

When I got to high school that was even worse, he was in std 9 and I was in std 6… oh the hell that I went through for two and half years was beyond comprehensible.  Not only was he a crush, but was friends with the friends that I grew up with and just happened to live next door to my cousin/best friend.  Lol come to think of it they all enjoyed teasing me about him and well at least I can say I gave them all something to laugh about a school.  I think he actually found out I did like him but I was still that shy ridiculous school girl that would still stammer and stutter on every word, would die of red inflamed cheeks and silly giggles… I was just a complicated mess really and the whole period of having a crush at school was not as fun as what its made out to be.

No eating, no spending time with my parents, just hibernating in my room listening to pathetic love songs, reading pathetic teenage love books and wishing and dreaming that this boy would even realize I existed.

So, years later and very much well into my adulthood with so much confidence it now scares the boys or should I say men away… lol no just kidding. Still all these years later and at 40 I find myself back where I started with a crush, where I twirl my hair when he talks to me or looks at me, I giggle ridiculously at the stupidest of things, I still blush like I did as a young girl maybe even more so now and honestly the things I say and do are just plain silly… what’s different… well I have more confidence, my crush knows I like him and without hiding behind my books and listening to love songs I am talking to him and telling him exactly how I feel.

 

 

 

 

 

So now I know why Foreigner has been playing in my head and apparently everyday on my iPhone and I now know why I feel so ridiculously happy with life.

I like having a crush at 40 and still feeling like school girl …

XXX

 

 

 

A world made so beautiful by mankind who love it can also be a world made so ugly, it opens the wounds we longingly close to make us feel the pain.  Even though we so desperately want it healed and closed forever.  A scar remains, which is a remembrance of that pain but that’s all it is, a scar a remembrance that we have the power to heal to make things so beautiful as it once was and only we carry the ability in ourselves to do so.  Don’t we all want to grow strong from our mistakes and not dwell in the pity party of our minds, walk away from the ridicule and blame that can only lead us into a continuous chaotic destruction of a nothing.  We can only be effected by what we hear and if we choose to hear it and accept it then we going to keep loosing hope in ourselves.  If we ignore it and brush it off then that alone is a positive step in a direction.

The intention of being happy and making each day something a little extra special is within ourselves.  It costs nothing to be kind to others, smile at strangers – even if they think you a little mad.  Which I have to say constantly live  through daily, but that’s me and I like to think I bring some element  of joy to someones life even if they laugh about it years later… lol.  Treat your fellow mankind with love and respect.  Treat animals with love and kindness because they are the eternal at showering us with love and affection no mater the situation.  Treat others as we would like to be treated back and see what happens.

The world has become bleak and with every passing moment we have the ability to change it.  Maybe not for each other but at least for ourselves. To wake up each day and face another day is not about waking up and being grateful to be alive, it should be waking up  and looking forward to what the day brings and what you can do to make it epic.

There is love and light in all of us.  Some hide it far too well but I guarantee those same people when they hear a song play, see someone smile, or even remember a time when things were happy. They, in turn, will smile even from the dark corners of their heart and soul.  We all have it in us, we all have the love to give we just need to sacrifice our sadness and hatred and put what will make everyday a little more achievable at an excitable pace that we enjoy and love to gain our passion for living life back.

It all starts with you!

We are only human after all… lighten up a little and laugh a bit more.

XXX